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Steven gallery This is a transcribed copy of "Know Your Fusion". Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Kindergarten Kid" Next: "Buddy's Book"
Speaker Dialogue
[Episode starts on Steven and Amethyst in the beach house]
Steven And then we go into the tricks.
Amethyst Alright. But I really think we should save the Dog Walker for next time.
Steven This is our first impression. We gotta go big. A-and we should go soon, too, before they get suspicious.
Pearl Those two are acting very suspicious. Should we ask them what's going on?
Garnet I can't.
Pearl Riiight... Steven, Amethyst! Is there something you'd like to tell us?
Steven So you guys know how we recently had an epic showdown in the Beta Kindergarten.
Amethyst And you know that during it, we beat Jasper.
Steven and Amethyst But do you know, who beat Jasper?
Pearl You two?
Garnet Peridot.
Amethyst It didn't land.
Steven Pick it back up, pick it back up!
Amethyst Ahem. We have someone we'd like you to meet!
Pearl Alright, let's meet this mysterious stranger.
(Steven and Amethyst fuse.)
Smoky Quartz Heya, I'm Smoky Quartz! Nice to meet ya.
Pearl AAAAAWOAHHH WHAAAAT?
Smoky Quartz Don't bother putting your socks back on, 'cause I'm about to knock 'em off again.
Garnet (Begins laughing with joy.)
Smoky Quartz Now you guys can see exactly how I beat Jasper. This is a little trick I like to call "Walk the dog"!
(Smoky Quartz rolls the yo-yo across the floor smashing it into the wall.)
Pearl Wait! Explain EVERYTHING!
(Garnet picks up Pearl and shakes her while shouting happily)
Smoky Quartz (Summons a second yo-yo) This one's called "Jog the Dog"!
(The second yo-yo smashes through the dishes on the kitchen counter and shatters Steven's television.)
Pearl Oh no!
Smoky Quartz Whoops! (Summons third yo-yo) Uh, this one's called "Dog-Walking Is Just My Day Job 'til I Finally Get That Callback"!
Pearl Garnet...? A little help?
(Pearl and Garnet fuse into Sardonyx and catch Smoky Quartz's yo-yos.)
Sardonyx Mnh-mnh-mnh! (Shakes her head.)
Smoky Quartz (Gasps) Sardonyx!
Sardonyx You know the rule about weapons in the house! Mostly allowed, really, but with some exceptions. Oh what a pleasure it is to meet you! You've made quite the impression already. In fact, there's one on the wall over there, and there...
(Sardonyx twists her body around to point out all the holes Smoky Quartz made)
Smoky Quartz Uh... Sorry, looks like I got a bit carried away. I can uh... "reel it in".
Sardonyx Oh-ho-ho-ho-hooo! Stop! But really, please stop. Your act is tremendous, but your stage is too small. We need some space to get to know each other. Somewhere a bit more... infinite.
(The temple door turns into a set of curtains and opens)
Smoky Quartz You have a room in the temple?
Sardonyx It exists as long as I exist. And here.. I am!
(Sardonyx crouches and squeezes her way through the curtains, using her lower set of hands to push herself all the way in.)
Sardonyx (Reaches out a hand and beckons Smoky Quartz inside.) Come now, don't be shy!
Smoky Quartz Bwooop! (Slides between the curtains.)
(The two enter a pitch black chamber. Only their eyes are visible)
Smoky Quartz I can't see nothin' in here.
Sardonyx You "cannot see anything", my darling. Because the show hasn't started yet!
Smoky Quartz "Show"?
Sardonyx Live, from a metaphysical room deep in the temple, it's "Sardonyx Tonight"!
(A neon sign with the "Sardonyx Tonight" logo hangs above a talk-show styled room, consisting of a large desk and a comfortable sofa chair which Smoky Quartz is sitting in.)
Sardonyx Goooood evening, everybody!
(Room fills with cheers from the audience.)
Sardonyx We have a brand-new fusion with us tonight! I'm so excited, I could just shatter! (Sardonyx throws microphone off stage; a crash and a cat's yowl is heard. Sardonyx walks over to the desk and crouches behind it.) Everyone welcome Smoky Quartz!
(Studio audience claps and cheers, Smoky Quartz waves with slight embarrassment.)
Sardonyx So tell me literally everything there is to know about yourself, and do not skip out on any of the juicy details.
(Audience cheers.)
Smoky Quartz Well... heh... I like, uh, long walks through the Kindergarten.
(Audience laughs.)
Smoky Quartz Uh, actually that's where I sort of - pow - became me. And, uh, pow - beat Jasper.
Sardonyx Oh, that Jasper! Always running 'round Kindergartens and causing trouble! Boy, that didn't quite work out for her. Guess she should go back to preschool, am I right, folks?
(Audience laughs.)
Smoky Quartz Yeah. She lost her mind in a corrupted fusion. I guess you could say she has a... short fuse?
(Sardonyx and audience laugh.)
Smoky Quartz Heh. Easy crowd, huh? Where'd you get 'em?
Sardonyx I made them myself. But Smoky, I think what we really want to know is who are you? Who is... Smoky Quartz?
Smoky Quartz Eh. Well, between the fight and now, I've really only existed for like ten minutes, so I... I dunno, but I do know how to do this! (Summons a yo-yo.) This one's called "Sad Baby in a Diaper"!
(Audience applauds.)
Sardonyx Yes, the yo-yo - seen it, lived it, loved it - but what about the rest of your game?
Smoky Quartz I ain't exactly a deck of cards here.
(Audience laughs.)
Smoky Quartz Oh! I can lick my elbow. I have three of them now! (Sticks their tongue out and tries to lick an elbow)
Sardonyx We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors! (snaps fingers and the overhead light goes out)
Smoky Quartz Huh?
Sardonyx Listen Smoky, let's talk - fusion-to-fusion. (Pulls out a makeup duster) That's a nice yo-yo, but I want to know the yo-you.
Smoky Quartz What? (Laughs as Sardonyx brushes their cheek with the duster.)
Sardonyx Smoky. There's bound to be way more to you than just... a yo-yo. (tosses makeup duster aside with a loud crash of broken glass. Sardonyx reaches behind her back.) You're a fusion, you're full of surprises! (Sardonyx pulls her hands out from behind her back, each hand has a pencil in it.) You just don't know it yet.
Smoky Quartz Yeah. Yeah I guess that is how surprises work!
(Sardonyx taps the pencils on the desk in thought. Suddenly her eyes open.)
Sardonyx I've got it! (Both sets of arms twirl, sending the pencils flying. A "Wilhelm Scream" scream is heard) Every fusion gets something new - a new power, a new weapon...
Smoky Quartz Like a yo-yo?
Sardonyx Yes...but better. Let's find out what's new about you! (snaps her finger and the spot light comes back on and the audience cheers) And welcome back! Don't those cartoon characters make you want to buy those products? I sure hope so, or else I'd be off air!
(Sardonyx and audience laughs)
Sardonyx We have a new segment for you all tonight. That's right, everyone; it's time to Hit. That. Bird!
(A large mountain-shaped prop appears with spring-loaded bird targets on it)
Sardonyx During Opal's adventures at the Sky Spire, she took down a flock of bird monsters with her bow. (As Sardonyx is making her presentation, a video appears of the event in question, captioned with "Footage Courtesy of Cartoon Network".)
Sardonyx Let's see if you've got her 'Opal'escent aim. Whaddya say, Smoky? Are you ready to "Hit That Bird"?
(Sardonx hands Smoky Quartz a bow and a quiver with four arrows)
Smoky Quartz Oh! Oh wow. A bow is kinda like a yo-yo, right? Except if the string went this-a-ways and hmm...
(Sardonyx pulls out an alarm clock)
Sardonyx Let's start, shall we? Time is an impatient thing!
(Smoky Quartz aims and shoots, missing every shot; the alarm clock goes off)
Sardonyx Uh-oh! Time's up! Let's see. The score tallies to...(does a quick calculation in her head and sighs sadly) one, two, three... zero.
(Audience "awwws")
Smoky Quartz Guess I'm a real..."bow-zo"?
(Audience laughs)
Sardonyx Whaddya say we move on to the next segment, everybody? (She leads Smoky Quartz to a fairground 'hammer' strength tester, there are pictures - from lowest to highest - of Pearl, Stevonnie, Garnet, Opal, and Sugilite at the top) Here we are! I call this segment...
Sugilite's voice "You Like That, Little Man?"
Sardonyx 'cause everybody loves a callback.
(Audience laughs)
Sardonyx (Quietly talking to someone "off-stage") She's not actually in this episode, do we still have to pay her? Yes? Fair enough. (Louder) Now it's no secret that us fine fusions pack an extra punch, but Sugilite is a standout for being a heavy-hitting powerhouse! But maybe you've got something to top Sugilite's swing?
Smoky Quartz Mmm, maybe?
(Sardonyx spins a mallet though the air and hands it to Smoky Quartz)
Sardonyx Just hit the base with this mallet, and we'll see how you measure up.
Smoky Quartz Okay! (slams mallet on the base, reaches Pearl's picture)
Sugilite's voice Is that all you got?
Sardonyx Ooh, very close. An extra spin around (rotates her arms around her body) always helps me!
(Audience and Sardonyx laugh)
Smoky Quartz An extra spin, huh? Okay...
(Smoky Quartz spins in a circle and brings the mallet down harder, reaching just below Garnet on the score bar)
Sugilite's voice Ha ha! Nice try!
Smoky Quartz What? One more time. (slams mallet one final time, reaching Garnet's picture)
Sugilite's voice You. Ain't. Nothing!
Sardonyx Hmm..yes. Something just isn't hitting right here. Maybe you're just strong (singing) in a different way. We'll find out in just moment. Play us over to stage right, Jorge.
Smoky Quartz Uuhh...
Sardonyx Okay, don't worry about that crowd. Don't worry about Jorge. It's just you and me.
Smoky Quartz Heh. No duh. Actually, who's Jorge?
Sardonyx Smoky, you're holding out on me. I'm ready to see your main event!
Smoky Quartz Eh. You and me both.
(Sardonyx leads Smoky Quartz to a bulls-eye target hanging from a rope)
Sardonyx Now, Alexandrite has a throat full of flames. Whether that's the cause of her raspy voice is up for debate. (as she speaks, a short video of Alexandrite fighting Malachite is shown) But there's no room for questions when she attacks, exhaling a burning blaze. So I call this segment..."Breath of Fire"!
Smoky Quartz Uh, Sardonyx...I don't know...
Sardonyx C'mon Smoky. Step up and see if you can spit some elemental chaos at the target!
(Smoky Quartz takes a few deep breaths, leans forward and lets out a small burp. The bulls-eye waves slightly. A member of the audience coughs. Smoky Quartz lets out an embarrassed laugh.)
Sardonyx Ha ha, we seem to be experiencing some magical difficulties, but don't change the channel! There must be some common thread between Steven and Amethyst that's heightened by their fusion...
Smoky Quartz I dunno, Sards, I guess zero plus zero equals zero.
(Audience laughs)
Sardonyx Something they both think, something they both do.
Smoky Quartz They say two wrongs don't make a right. I guess I'm living proof that that's true!
(Audience continues laughing)
Smoky Quartz I'm just one big, super-wrong, good-for-nothing dud with a yo-yo!
(Sardonyx gets an embarrassed look on her face)
Sardonyx (to herself) They want to impress us...they were planning this all morning; we hijacked their show! I was excited! (yelling) IT'S NOT ABOUT US!
(The studio goes completely black. Suddenly the room lights up as Sardonyx separates back into Garnet and Pearl. The stage immediately begins falling apart.)
Smoky Quartz What's happening?!
Garnet It's Sardonyx! If she's not here, the room can't exist!
Pearl Garnet!
Garnet Pearl!
(The "Sardonyx Tonight" sign collapses between them, blowing a huge hole in the floor. Pearl and Garnet are trapped on ledges. Smoky Quartz rushes towards Pearl and grabs her while creating a yo-yo. They throw it through the curtain-portal and use the rope as a grappling hook, grabbing Garnet by the arm as they swing past. The three of them pass through and go flying out of the temple door and land in the living room, causing Steven and Amethyst to separate. The three get up with groans of pain.)
Steven Sorry for the rough landing.
Amethyst Ugggh...
Pearl What are you talking about?!
Garnet That was amazing!
(Steven laughs)
Pearl (wraps Amethyst in a huge hug) Oh Amethyst! You've been such a good influence on him!
Amethyst It's kinda the other way around.
Garnet You didn't tell us that yo-yo can grapple.
Steven It can do so much stuff!
Pearl Wait, so do you use it like a lasso or a flail?
Amethyst It's better than a flail!
Steven It's a toy!
Pearl It's so unexpected.
Garnet Give us the play-by-play.
Amethyst So...there we were...
(Star iris closes on the beach house's door)
[Episode End]


ve Transcripts
Pilot Pilot
Season 1 A: Gem GlowLaser Light CannonCheeseburger BackpackTogether BreakfastFryboCat FingersBubble BuddiesSerious StevenTiger MillionaireSteven's LionArcade ManiaGiant WomanSo Many BirthdaysLars and the Cool KidsOnion TradeSteven the Sword FighterLion 2: The MovieBeach PartyRose's RoomCoach StevenJoking VictimSteven and the StevensMonster BuddiesAn Indirect KissMirror Gem/Ocean Gem

B: House GuestSpace RaceSecret TeamIsland AdventureKeep Beach City WeirdFusion CuisineGarnet's UniverseWatermelon StevenLion 3: Straight to VideoWarp TourAlone TogetherThe TestFuture VisionOn the RunHorror ClubWinter ForecastMaximum CapacityMarble MadnessRose's ScabbardOpen BookShirt ClubStory for StevenThe MessagePolitical PowerThe Return/Jail Break

Season 2 Full DisclosureJoy RideSay UncleLove LettersReformedSworn to the SwordRising Tides, Crashing SkiesKeeping It TogetherWe Need to TalkChille TidCry for HelpKeystone MotelOnion FriendHistorical FrictionFriend ShipNightmare HospitalSadie's SongCatch and ReleaseWhen it RainsBack to the BarnToo FarThe AnswerSteven's BirthdayIt Could've Been GreatMessage ReceivedLog Date 7 15 2
Season 3 Super Watermelon Island/Gem DrillSame Old WorldBarn MatesHit the DiamondSteven FloatsDrop Beat DadMr. GregToo Short to RideThe New LarsBeach City DriftRestaurant WarsKiki's Pizza Delivery ServiceMonster ReunionAlone at SeaGreg the BabysitterGem HuntCrack the WhipSteven vs. AmethystBismuthBetaEarthlingsBack to the MoonBubbled
Season 4 The Kindergarten KidKnow Your FusionBuddy's BookMindful EducationFuture Boy ZoltronLast One Out of Beach CityOnion GangGem HarvestThree Gems and a BabySteven's DreamAdventures in Light DistortionGem HeistThe ZooThat Will Be AllThe New Crystal GemsStorm in the RoomRocknaldoTiger PhilanthropistRoom for RubyLion 4: Alternate EndingDoug OutThe Good LarsAre You My Dad?I Am My Mom
Season 5 Stuck TogetherThe TrialOff ColorsLars' HeadDewey Wins
Shorts The Classroom Gems: What Are Gems?We Are the Crystal GemsThe Classroom Gems: How Are Gems Made?UnboxingThe Classroom Gems: FusionCooking with LionGem KaraokeSteven ReactsVideo ChatSteven's Song Time