Steven gallery This is a transcribed copy of "Kindergarten Kid". Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Bubbled" Next: "Know Your Fusion"
Speaker Dialogue
[The episode begins with the Crystal Gems looking through the Beta Kindergarten for the leftover Corrupted Gems. The Corrupted Gems are snarling in the background as the Crystal Gems search.]
Steven Here's another one!
Garnet Got it, Steven! Ready... Go!
Amethyst Grab its legs!
Garnet That's not a leg!
Amethyst Ow!
(Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl poof the Corrupted Gem and come out, while Garnet has her gemstone in a bubble.)
Pearl It's a little disturbing that Jasper was just keeping these Corrupted Gems in cages.
Amethyst Isn't that what we're doing?
Pearl That's different.
Garnet They're cared for in the stasis of the bubble. As long as they're bubbled, they can't hurt anyone, and they won't suffer. It's what Rose wanted.
(Steven and Peridot watch one of the other Corrupted Gems.)
Steven Huh. I guess this is the last of them.
(The Corrupted Gem snarls as she erratically runs all over the hole she is trapped in.)
Peridot [Laughs] I can't believe these dumb things used to be Gems!
(Garnet walks over and signals the other Gems to come over.)
Garnet Pearl, Amethyst, get ready. This one is flighty.
Steven Are Corrupted Gems not like this on Homeworld?
Peridot We don't have anything like this on Homeworld.
Garnet Here we go.
(Garnet pulls the bar that keeps the Corrupted Gem trapped, and she charges into Garnet.)
Steven Garnet!
(Amethyst tries to reel the Corrupted Gem back with the whip but gets dragged off. Pearl shoots at the Corrupted Gem to no success as she runs back to throw Amethyst at her. The Corrupted Gem scales the wall up to higher ground and successfully retreats.)
Peridot [Laughs] That was terrible!
Pearl This is harder than it looks, you know!
Peridot How could you all be outsmarted by that thing?
Pearl Well, first, it ran over Garnet, and then Amethyst tried to use her--
Garnet Uh, we don't need the play by play. Mistakes happen, even when you can see the future.
Amethyst Yeah, Peridot. Let's see you do better.
Peridot Well, I saved all your butts from Jasper. I suppose I could help you here, too.
Garnet Feel free.
Peridot This'll be a great chance to show off my metal powers!
Garnet Then our work here is done.
Steven Uh, I-I'm...
Amethyst Are you seriously going to help her?
Steven It's just... She's all alone out there, with no idea what she's doing.
Pearl Oh, Peridot will be fine.
Steven I meant the monster!
Garnet [Chuckles] Okay. Take as long as you need.
Pearl Uh, Garnet, are you sure?
(The Crystal Gems walk off, and Steven runs up to Peridot who is currently devising a plan.)
Steven Wait. [Pants]
Peridot Did the others ask you to bring me back?
Steven No, I came to help! It usually takes all of us to capture a Corrupted Gem.
Peridot That's because you try to out-brute it. We're going to outsmart it!
Steven So... I can help?
Peridot I could use your experience dealing with these things. It just doesn't seem fair.
Steven Why's that?
Peridot With you and me teaming up, that thing won't stand a chance.
(They both begin to laugh triumphantly.)
Steven Yeah!
(The Corrupted Gem they are pursuing runs through them. Peridot and Steven begin to give chase.)
Peridot After it!
(Peridot and Steven crawl behind a rock and peek at the Corrupted Gem's current activity.)
Peridot What's it doing?
(The Corrupted Gem in the distance is staring at one of the injectors.)
Steven Maybe it likes shiny things?
Peridot This is perfect! I've just concocted a flawless Peri-plan!
Steven So what's the P.P.?
Peridot If I use my metal powers, the whole thing will fall onto the monster!
Steven Give it a try!
(Peridots begins to tamper with one of the injector's legs.)
Peridot Carefully...
(Peridot manages to remove one of the legs and lets it fall to the ground. This does nothing but confuse the Corrupted Gem about to be victimized.)
Steven It's... not falling.
Peridot Maybe another leg needs to go.
(Peridot removes another leg, resulting in the aforementioned result.)
Peridot [Growls] Fall! You stupid...
(Two more legs are removed. It does nothing and the Corrupted Gem decides to venture somewhere else.)
Peridot Oh come on! [Grunts] Fall already!
(As Peridot kicks the wall, the area the injector is embedded in begins to crack.)
Steven Peridot, watch out!
Peridot Oh, right. Thank you.
(Peridot kicks the wall again, and a bunch of boulders fall on top of her.)
Steven Uh, Peridot!
(Steven runs over to Peridot but is greeted by the Corrupted Gem.)
Peridot There it is! Get it!
(Steven pulls up a shield to fend off the Corrupted Gem's attacks.)
Peridot Keep distracting it! I'll finish it off!
(As Peridot says that, the injector finally falls, but onto her instead. Steven walks over to check if Peridot is okay, sacrificing the chance to capture the Corrupted Gem.)
Steven You okay?
Peridot I think we need to... revise our strategy.
[Fade to black.]
Peridot Are you ready for the second Peri-plan?
Steven The first one wasn't so great.
Peridot Yes, noted, Steven. But this plan is even more flawless! I cannibalized the injector to make a rudimentary cannon! Observe.
(Peridot activates the cannon, which shoots a large object into the distance.)
Steven Whoa! Impressive!
Peridot You got that right. This way, we can take it out from a distance!
Steven Oh, there it is!
Peridot I got it!
(The Corrupted Gem comes on the scene, notices Steven and Peridot, and shoots her tongues in the air in response. Peridot prepares to open fire.)
Peridot Heh, you clod.
(Peridot activates the cannon. The cannon does not shoot.)
Peridot Huh? [Sighs] Work, you stupid--
(The cannon fires, the resulting recoil sending it backward into Peridot, crashing her into the wall behind her and creating a mini-avalanche of boulders. The Corrupted Gem approaches Steven.)
Steven Uhh... hey. You win this round.
(The Corrupted Gem attacks Steven as the scene fades to black.)
Peridot Okay. I've analyzed the problems with the previous two Peri-plans. Relying on the injectors introduced too many complicating variables. Now we only have to rely on simple physics! We'll wait until it gets right up under us, not suspecting a thing because it's so dumb! And then we'll drop this rock on its stupid head! It's even more flawless! And at this height, nothing can fall on us!
Steven What if it doesn't stop where we want it to?
Peridot I'm doing the best I can, Steven!
(The Corrupted Gem appears behind Steven and Peridot and scares them off the cliff. The Corrupted Gem taps the boulder to let it fall as well.)
Peridot I--
(The boulder falls onto Peridot and carries her away. Steven gives chase until he and Peridot come across an eroded formation of sandstone resembling a loop-de-loop. Peridot goes around and hits Steven who protects himself with the bubble. He goes around and hits Peridot's boulder that goes around half-way.)
Peridot I think--
(The boulder falls on Peridot.)
Steven You don't poof easily, huh?
Peridot Us Peridots are tougher than we look!
[Fade to black. It is now night time.]
(Steven is cooking a marshmallow as Peridot is celebrating her latest devised plan in the distance.)
Peridot Yes! This is going to work. This is going to be perfect! This is going to be...
(A construction of the injector is shown. Without proper supporting beams, it falls apart.)
Peridot ...a waste of my time.
(Peridot walks over to Steven, who is enjoying his marshmallows next to the campfire.)
Peridot Why can't I master this?
Steven Aw, Peridot, it's okay. Even if none of your Peri-plans worked, at least they were really funny. The others will probably think so, too, when we go back and get 'em.
Peridot Go back? Let it be known that I, Peridot, refuse to move forward or back until I am victorious.
Steven Right.
Peridot I don't get it. I'm smarter than your average Peridot. How did I fail today against some barely functional, stupid, cloddy, dumb-dumb?!
Steven Hey, hey, corruptions aren't dumb. They just think a little different, that's all.
Peridot Okay, just to make sure my Earth vocabulary is correct on this... let's say I'm a monster. I spend all my time slamming my face into hard objects and throwing my tongues in the air for fun. How am I not... dumb?
Steven Well, she must be doing something right. She hasn't fallen for any of your Peri-plans.
Peridot It's luck! Nothing that thing does makes any sense!
(Steven starts throwing marshmallows at Peridot.)
Peridot Hey.
(Steven taunts the anticipation of another marshmallow and throws another one, eventually throwing dozens.)
Peridot [Growls] [Yells] Why are you bombarding me with your confectionery puff rocks?!
Steven To show you what it's like to be a monster! Pretend I'm a freaked-out human screaming at you in fear! Pretend I'm an Earth animal chasing you away from your first safe hiding spot! Pretend I'm an angry green Gem trying to poof you! (becoming angry) This is life for you now! Endless suffering!
Peridot [Grunts] [Yells]
(Peridot finally breaks and steals the marshmallows bag from Steven. She chews and waves it around in a fit of anger, proving Steven's point.)
Steven There! You see?
Peridot Yeah.
Steven What you're doing makes total sense! You remember what it was like to have everything important taken away? Being under attack? Feeling trapped? You were frustrated. So is she! Why don't you try thinking about all of this from her point of view?
Peridot Hmm.
[Transition to daytime]
(The Corrupted Gem is seen shooting her tongues into the air as Steven and Peridot spy on her current activity.)
Steven You can do it.
(Peridot walks over to the Corrupted Gem. The Corrupted Gem watches Peridot intently.)
Peridot Ugh. I can't take this dirty tongue-flapper seriously.
Steven Think... like... a monster.
(Peridot, after some consideration, begins to "think like a monster" and shoot her tongue in the air. The Corrupted Gem approves of it. Peridot hops over and continues hopping as the two shoot their tongues in the air as playtime, which Steven finds cute as he watches. After some time, Peridot sneaks up to the snarling Corrupted Gem and kicks her, triggering the Corrupted Gem into a frenzy. Steven runs over to fix things up.)
Peridot Hey!
Steven It's okay! We don't want to fight! Just let Peridot bubble you! We can all get along--
(Steven is inadvertently knocked away in a bubble by the Corrupted Gem. Peridot continues to wrestle the Corrupted Gem until they meet the edge of a cliff.)
Steven No, no, no, no, no!
Peridot Give me... that... gem!
(The Corrupted Gem slips and falls, taking Peridot with her.)
Steven Peridot! [Gasps]
(Steven floats down to see what happened. Peridot climbs out of the crater she and the Corrupted Gem made. The Corrupted Gem has finally poofed.)
Peridot [Pants heavily] I did it.
Steven [Sighs]
(Steven helps Peridot out of the hole. Garnet comes onto the scene.)
Steven Oh, hey. You're back!
Garnet Eh, we never really left.
(The Crystal Gems reveal they were watching the whole time.)
Amethyst We knew it'd be funny.
Garnet Future vision.
Peridot Y-you were all watching this whole time?
(Peridot holds the Corrupted Gem's gemstone in front of her, proof of her success in catching the monster.)
Peridot I told you I could do it. But I have to admit, it was more difficult than expected. This Corrupted Gem was truly an adversary worthy of my skill.
(Peridot inadvertently bubbles the gemstone.)
Steven Whoa! Peridot!
Amethyst Nice bubble, Peri!
Peridot W-what do I do with it?
Garnet Send it off.
Steven Just tap the top.
(Peridot does so, and the bubble travels elsewhere.)
Steven Happy trails!
Peridot So, where did it go?
Steven Home.
(The scene arrives at the barn as the bubble appears there. Lapis is reading a book called "Pretty Hairstylist". She notices the bubble, but does not care and continues reading as the star iris zooms in on the bubble and ends the episode.)
[The end.]

ve Transcripts
Pilot Pilot
Season 1 A: Gem GlowLaser Light CannonCheeseburger BackpackTogether BreakfastFryboCat FingersBubble BuddiesSerious StevenTiger MillionaireSteven's LionArcade ManiaGiant WomanSo Many BirthdaysLars and the Cool KidsOnion TradeSteven the Sword FighterLion 2: The MovieBeach PartyRose's RoomCoach StevenJoking VictimSteven and the StevensMonster BuddiesAn Indirect KissMirror Gem/Ocean Gem

B: House GuestSpace RaceSecret TeamIsland AdventureKeep Beach City WeirdFusion CuisineGarnet's UniverseWatermelon StevenLion 3: Straight to VideoWarp TourAlone TogetherThe TestFuture VisionOn the RunHorror ClubWinter ForecastMaximum CapacityMarble MadnessRose's ScabbardOpen BookShirt ClubStory for StevenThe MessagePolitical PowerThe Return/Jail Break

Season 2 Full DisclosureJoy RideSay UncleLove LettersReformedSworn to the SwordRising Tides, Crashing SkiesKeeping It TogetherWe Need to TalkChille TidCry for HelpKeystone MotelOnion FriendHistorical FrictionFriend ShipNightmare HospitalSadie's SongCatch and ReleaseWhen it RainsBack to the BarnToo FarThe AnswerSteven's BirthdayIt Could've Been GreatMessage ReceivedLog Date 7 15 2
Season 3 Super Watermelon Island/Gem DrillSame Old WorldBarn MatesHit the DiamondSteven FloatsDrop Beat DadMr. GregToo Short to RideThe New LarsBeach City DriftRestaurant WarsKiki's Pizza Delivery ServiceMonster ReunionAlone at SeaGreg the BabysitterGem HuntCrack the WhipSteven vs. AmethystBismuthBetaEarthlingsBack to the MoonBubbled
Season 4 The Kindergarten KidKnow Your FusionBuddy's BookMindful EducationFuture Boy ZoltronLast One Out of Beach CityOnion GangGem HarvestThree Gems and a BabySteven's DreamAdventures in Light DistortionGem HeistThe ZooThat Will Be AllThe New Crystal GemsStorm in the RoomRocknaldoTiger PhilanthropistRoom for RubyLion 4: Alternate EndingDoug OutThe Good LarsAre You My Dad?I Am My Mom
Season 5 Stuck TogetherThe TrialOff ColorsLars' HeadDewey WinsGemcationRaising the BarnBack to the KindergartenSadie KillerKevin PartyLars of the StarsJungle MoonYour Mother and MineThe Big ShowPool HoppingLetters to LarsCan't Go BackA Single Pale RoseNow We're Only Falling ApartWhat's Your Problem?The QuestionMade of HonorReunited
Shorts Lion Loves to Fit in a BoxThe Classroom Gems: What Are Gems?We Are the Crystal GemsThe Classroom Gems: How Are Gems Made?UnboxingThe Classroom Gems: FusionCooking with LionGem KaraokeSteven ReactsVideo ChatSteven's Song Time